{"id":1116,"date":"2019-04-29T12:57:35","date_gmt":"2019-04-29T15:57:35","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.blogsoestado.com\/ewertonneto\/?p=1116"},"modified":"2019-04-29T12:57:35","modified_gmt":"2019-04-29T15:57:35","slug":"o-supermaniaco","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/blogs2.blogsoestado.com\/ewertonneto\/2019\/04\/29\/o-supermaniaco\/","title":{"rendered":"O superman\u00edaco"},"content":{"rendered":"\n
\"\"
s\u00f3 podia estar num volante <\/figcaption><\/figure>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n\n\n

Quando escrevi\nneste jornal, anos atr\u00e1s,  a cr\u00f4nica Os Man\u00edacos do Volante<\/em>, baseada nos mais\nestramb\u00f3ticos tipos que se v\u00ea dirigindo no tr\u00e2nsito desta cidade, surpreendeu-me\nque alguns leitores me exortassem a inserir novos tipos por eles sugeridos.\nMais tarde, essa cr\u00f4nica se transformou num cap\u00edtulo do livro O ABC bem\nhumorado de S\u00e3o Lu\u00eds, com algumas novidades. Bem se v\u00ea que tive de fazer uma\nsele\u00e7\u00e3o porque a colet\u00e2nea \u00e9 grande. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Nessa exuberante\nlista de man\u00edacos se inscrevem desde O Imperador das Avenidas ( o dono)  at\u00e9 o Touro do Asfalto ( o irado). <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Por incr\u00edvel\nque pare\u00e7a, de l\u00e1 para c\u00e1, embora nem tanto tempo assim tenha passado,     a fauna\naumentou. Seja porque os ve\u00edculos triplicaram e os engarrafamentos e\nhisterismos idem, novos candidatos se apresentaram para fazer jus ao ep\u00edteto de\nman\u00edacos.  O mais curioso para n\u00e3o dizer desolador\n\u00e9 que, como se n\u00e3o bastasse a cont\u00ednua profus\u00e3o de novos man\u00edacos eis que os\nque os antigos se aperfei\u00e7oaram. Se antigamente a exclama\u00e7\u00e3o em voga diante do\nque se via era: \u201cHaja man\u00edaco!\u201d a constata\u00e7\u00e3o dos dias de hoje precisa ser\noutra: \u201cHaja super-man\u00edacos!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Sim, porque os\nman\u00edacos que j\u00e1 existiam se aperfei\u00e7oaram, e se tornaram cada vez mais\neloquentes no comando de seus carros, sendo o exemplo mais bem acabado dessa\ns\u00edndrome o tipo que na cr\u00f4nica anterior foi chamado de Masturbardor de Buzina. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Ora, o Masturbardor\nde Buzina,  \u00e9 aquele man\u00edaco que tem\nobsess\u00e3o por acionar a sua buzina e n\u00e3o est\u00e1 nem a\u00ed, claro, para o ouvido dos\noutros. Seu frenesi \u00e9 t\u00e3o ostensivo que se desconfia que ele esteja sempre\nprestes a ter um orgasmo com o ato de buzinar, da\u00ed o cognome. Devidamente classificado,\nsegundo os leitores, sua identifica\u00e7\u00e3o parecia esgotada, mas n\u00e3o \u00e9 que o dito\ncujo foi al\u00e9m e se aprimorou?  Se antes\nele acionava a buzina apenas pelo fato de o sinal abrir instantaneamente,\nestivesse onde estivesse na fila (como se o motorista da frente tivesse o dom\nde desaparecer apenas para satisfaz\u00ea-lo ), nos dias atuais ele adquiriu uma especializa\u00e7\u00e3o\nhist\u00e9rica. Pouco ligando para o sinal que lhe compete nos cruzamentos, agora\nele desenvolveu a mania de ficar vigiando o sinal da fila alheia. Se o sinal\nfecha para esta,  ele j\u00e1 come\u00e7a a acionar\na sua buzina instigando o pobre motorista do carro que est\u00e1 na frente.  Ou seja, ele exige que o coitado, em frente da\nsua sinaleira, al\u00e9m de desaparecer em um segundo antecipe-se ao tempo de\ntransi\u00e7\u00e3o entre uma faixa e outra. Se n\u00e3o for atendido na velocidade da luz, buzina\nnele! <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Como esse tipo\nde evolu\u00e7\u00e3o Charles Darwin n\u00e3o explica, recorri a um amigo psicanalista. Quem\nsabe Freud!… Ele me sugeriu prontamente que essa esp\u00e9cie de man\u00edaco nunca adquire\num carro para simplesmente dirigir, mas para buzinar, sendo previdente  que, quando morra,  leve uma buzina dentro do caix\u00e3o por\npreven\u00e7\u00e3o, n\u00e3o s\u00f3 para anunciar sua chegada no outro mundo,  como para furar a fila quando estiver no c\u00e9u. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

N\u00e3o pude\ndeixar de retrucar: <\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cSugest\u00e3o brilhante, mas ser\u00e1 que esse \u00a0man\u00edaco estar\u00e1 na fila do c\u00e9u, ou do inferno? \u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Jose Ewerton Neto \u00e9 autor de O ABC bem humorado de S\u00e3o Luis <\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"\"
Nas livrarias Amei , Tempo de ler e Vozes<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Quando escrevi neste jornal, anos atr\u00e1s,  a cr\u00f4nica Os Man\u00edacos do Volante, baseada nos mais estramb\u00f3ticos tipos que se v\u00ea […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":9,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"site-sidebar-layout":"default","site-content-layout":"","ast-site-content-layout":"default","site-content-style":"default","site-sidebar-style":"default","ast-global-header-display":"","ast-banner-title-visibility":"","ast-main-header-display":"","ast-hfb-above-header-display":"","ast-hfb-below-header-display":"","ast-hfb-mobile-header-display":"","site-post-title":"","ast-breadcrumbs-content":"","ast-featured-img":"","footer-sml-layout":"","ast-disable-related-posts":"","theme-transparent-header-meta":"","adv-header-id-meta":"","stick-header-meta":"","header-above-stick-meta":"","header-main-stick-meta":"","header-below-stick-meta":"","astra-migrate-meta-layouts":"default","ast-page-background-enabled":"default","ast-page-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"ast-content-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-4)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-4)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-4)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[3],"class_list":["post-1116","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-sem-categoria","tag-transito"],"yoast_head":"\nO superman\u00edaco - Ewerton Neto<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/blogs2.blogsoestado.com\/ewertonneto\/2019\/04\/29\/o-supermaniaco\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"pt_BR\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"O superman\u00edaco - Ewerton Neto\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Quando escrevi neste jornal, anos atr\u00e1s,  a cr\u00f4nica Os Man\u00edacos do Volante, baseada nos mais estramb\u00f3ticos tipos que se v\u00ea […]\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/blogs2.blogsoestado.com\/ewertonneto\/2019\/04\/29\/o-supermaniaco\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Ewerton Neto\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2019-04-29T15:57:35+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"https:\/\/www.blogsoestado.com\/ewertonneto\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/8\/2019\/04\/buzina5-1-1.jpg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Ewerton Neto\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Escrito por\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"Ewerton Neto\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. tempo de leitura\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"3 minutos\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\\\/\\\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"Article\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/blogs2.blogsoestado.com\\\/ewertonneto\\\/2019\\\/04\\\/29\\\/o-supermaniaco\\\/#article\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/blogs2.blogsoestado.com\\\/ewertonneto\\\/2019\\\/04\\\/29\\\/o-supermaniaco\\\/\"},\"author\":{\"name\":\"Ewerton Neto\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/blogs2.blogsoestado.com\\\/ewertonneto\\\/#\\\/schema\\\/person\\\/b000753f64dc46078048f1efdf5dacfc\"},\"headline\":\"O superman\u00edaco\",\"datePublished\":\"2019-04-29T15:57:35+00:00\",\"mainEntityOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/blogs2.blogsoestado.com\\\/ewertonneto\\\/2019\\\/04\\\/29\\\/o-supermaniaco\\\/\"},\"wordCount\":607,\"commentCount\":0,\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/blogs2.blogsoestado.com\\\/ewertonneto\\\/2019\\\/04\\\/29\\\/o-supermaniaco\\\/#primaryimage\"},\"thumbnailUrl\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.blogsoestado.com\\\/ewertonneto\\\/wp-content\\\/uploads\\\/sites\\\/8\\\/2019\\\/04\\\/buzina5-1-1.jpg\",\"keywords\":[\"tr\u00e2nsito\"],\"inLanguage\":\"pt-BR\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"CommentAction\",\"name\":\"Comment\",\"target\":[\"https:\\\/\\\/blogs2.blogsoestado.com\\\/ewertonneto\\\/2019\\\/04\\\/29\\\/o-supermaniaco\\\/#respond\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/blogs2.blogsoestado.com\\\/ewertonneto\\\/2019\\\/04\\\/29\\\/o-supermaniaco\\\/\",\"url\":\"https:\\\/\\\/blogs2.blogsoestado.com\\\/ewertonneto\\\/2019\\\/04\\\/29\\\/o-supermaniaco\\\/\",\"name\":\"O superman\u00edaco - 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